Therefore, why not treat your emotional energy as you would your money and govern it with the same basic, sound, economic principles? "Buy wholesale" whenever you can. Why pay more for something than it is truly worth? How many times have you spent 50 emotional dollars on a five dollar traffic jam? Why do we treat a brief delay in traffic as though it holds the same emotional value as a serious illness or the collapse of a marriage? The inability to prioritize situations in terms of their emotional value is a hallmark of someone under stress. As a result, circumstances are often treated equally, as if they all were life and death events.

I see this phenomenon quite frequently. It affects CEOs and secretaries alike. When I was in private practice, I once met with a client who had some difficulty locating my office and, as a result, was about ten minutes late for her first appointment. She became so exasperated by her delay that she was ready to cancel the remainder of her session (which was for stress management)! Although the issues for which she sought my assistance were far more serious than a ten minute inconvenience, she was temporarily unable to discern the difference. That style of emotional spending was costing her a fortune.

Think back to a recent situation in which you found yourself feeling stressed. Review the circumstances and try to recall how much emotional energy you spent. Did you spend more than was necessary? It's easy to do. In retrospect, you will often discover that your reaction was more intense than the situation warranted. This type of overspending is typically linked to your style of thinking. Later on I shall explore various methods for reducing emotional expenses. But first, I want to explain something about thoughts.